Book Review: The Princess and the Kiss

My cute and wonderful wife loves to change the decor in our living room every month or two. As part of that, she puts out collections of books and magazines, related to that particular theme. Last weekend was the big Valentine's Day push. Our house is now exquisitely arrayed in reds, pinks, and purples (very manly, I know!). On a lampstand sit several love-themed picture books, including this one: The Princess and the Kiss, by Jennie Bishop. What it lacks in action, it makes up for with a strong Biblical view of courtship and a heartwarming story that brings tears to our eyes, every time we read it together.

In the story, a baby girl is born to a King and Queen. God entrusts the new parents with a most precious gift: their daughter's First Kiss. As she grows, they dilligently guard their daughter's treasure, until she is old enough to be entrusted with it. Suitors then come, asking for her hand in marriage, and the story tells the tale of how she finds the only one to whom she will trust with her most treasured possession.

It's simple, but sweet, and appropriate for any age. It reads like a fairy tale and manages to teach a moral without sounding preachy. Our son loves to hear it each year, and I think it's a great opportunity for us to impart our views of dating, on to our son (even though we did not follow those protocols ourselves).

Now, for some background...

Although our son is not yet a teenager, it's never too early to develop a Biblical model of dating, for your children. Dating and relationships are difficult topics for parents to discuss, and Farrah and I want to avoid the mistakes that we feel our respective parents made when raising us. So, a couple years ago, we attended a talk on courtship, given by a pastor in our area, and our eyes were opened.

The Bible has lots of examples (good and bad) of how men and women got together (Adam and Eve, Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel and Leah, Sampson and his women, David and his women, Solomon and his women, etc...), but there is no single recipe for how God specifically wants his people to handle courtship.

While parents implement it to varying degrees, courtship is somewhere between the sterility of arranged marriages and the emotionally clouded, modern dating model. The basic idea is that the parents are responsible for their children's purity, and need to guide the process by which their children select a spouse.

Some of the guidelines include:

• A minimum age for courtship (possibly old enough to marry)
• Boy asks parents' permission first
• Boy and girl do not "go out", but get to know each other only as part of family activities
• Boy and girl study the Bible together with the families
• Affectionate behavior, including the first kiss, reserved for marriage

This may sound strict and maybe unrealistic, but it represents the moral high ground that our children and society so desperately need. Divorce rates are at an all-time high. Teen and out-of-wedlock pregnancies are rising. Domestic and same-sex "partnerships" are getting footholds as acceptable "lifestyles". If we are to salvage what's left of the traditional family and Biblical marriage as its cornerstone, we must make the effort to pass on those values to our children.

Judge Not?

My friend Jim recently did an editorial on what the Bible says about judging, which reminded me that I had been wanting to post on this subject, for some time. At his urging, I am doing so now.

"Judge not, that ye be not judged" (Matthew 7:1). We've all heard and read this scripture. In fact, the world has drilled it into our heads so much, that many of us are beginning to apply it to every situation. It's the Biblical justification for political correctness and the mantra of "live and let live."

But it's a lie, my friends. The world of sinners is using this quote by Jesus, taken out of context, to disarm true Christians and prevent them from pointing out sin. Here, I will attempt to put the verse in context and provide you with several other verses, with which you can build a defense shield, against the fiery arrows of the enemy.

First, read Matthew 7:1-5, to see what Jesus' point was. It becomes apparent that He was talking to hypocrites (v. 5), who point out people's flaws that they themselves also suffer from. It's like one alcoholic telling another to stop drinking. What's Jesus' solution? "First cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye." So He's saying, "don't judge, until your own judgement is cleared of the same sin."

This sets up His next statement, in v 6, "Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine...." So, he has us purify our hearts, so that we may be able to tell the deaf ears from the ready hearts.

In vs 15-16, Jesus warns us about false prophets, "Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits." So clearly, we are to judge who is a false prophet, and He even tells us how: by their words and deeds.

But what does it mean to judge? In the Bible, this word has two connotations. The first is discernment, telling good deeds from evil deeds. Even without studying God's Word, most people can do this, to a certain level. Any rational being will tell you that stealing and murder are wrong. Even if we're trapped by sin, we usually know that we are doing wrong, for our conscience pricks us. But to tell it to another person, who knows that we are trapped in the same sin is hypocritical and would have little effect on that person.

The second meaning is that of condemning someone for their evil actions, as in a court of law. Obviously, only God will ever have the power to actually sentence someone to an eternity in Hell. However, we have the right to tell a sinner, "Jesus says that if you do not repent, you will die in Hell" (Luke 13:3,5).

So can we really judge? Are there other scriptures that support us (provided we have searched our hearts and found them free of clouding of sin)? You bet!

Proverbs 26, for example, has plenty to say about how we should deal with fools. But how can we tell if someone's a fool, unless we judge them a fool?

"But truly I am full of power by the spirit of the LORD, and of judgment, and of might, to declare unto Jacob his transgression, and to Israel his sin" (Micah 3:8). This is one of my favorite verses, which assures us that the Holy Spirit gives us the power and authority to point out other people's sins. Obviously, this should be in a loving attitude, in an effort to steer them back to the Light.

Paul also has a lot to say about hypocritical judging, in Romans 2.

And perhaps one of the clearest encouragements to judge others in righteousness, is found in Lev. 19:15: "Ye shall do no unrighteousness in judgment: thou shalt not respect the person of the poor, nor honour the person of the mighty: but in righteousness shalt thou judge thy neighbour."

The picture above was copied from a similar article on judging, from the Word Incarnate blog.

Just Jump In, Already!

"He that observeth the wind shall not sow; and he that regardeth the clouds shall not reap" (Ecclesiastes 11:4).

We took a mini-vacation for our anniversary, to a relatively new hotel only 20 minutes from our house. The highlight was spending a total of 5 hours in the pool. Much of the time, we were the only ones there! As part of that, we decided to have my wife take pictures of Kylen and me doing cool jumps into the water. We spent quite a bit of time trying to capture the perfect pose, or the perfect splash, or....

I cannot tell you how many times we tried getting a shot of Kylen and me jumping in together, at just the right time. We had a really hard time synchonizing the camera with the jump, especially when taking into account the camera's own shutter delay. My arms got so tired, climbing out of the pool so many times! But we wanted it to turn out a certain way and our stubborness pushed us to do quite a bit of extra work. We never did get a satisfactory shot.

The experience reminded me of times in my life when I wanted to get into something new, but didn't, because I wanted to do it a certain way or kept waiting for just the right time to do it. My current dream of launching my own software business is just that way!

How many times have you over-analyzed or over-planned something, and eventually either lost the nerve, interest, inspiration, or opportunity to do it?

So quit analyzing and just jump in, already!

By the way, the shot above was the first one Farrah took of me, and we loved it!