Greg's Testimony: Farrah's Viewpoint

Posted by: Farrah


I wish that I was worthy of the rosy picture Greg painted in his testimony. I wish I could say that I was a perfect Christian, but that is not the case. It would have been best if my husband had been my first date. He can say his wife (me) was his first kiss, but I was not so noble. I tried very hard to mess up God’s plans. As sincere and devoted as I was to my faith, it seemed I could not master the temptation of dating the wrong men.

Thankfully, God was merciful and intervened. One lost interest, one had a heart attack and returned to his Arab country from where he basically proposed. His family was wealthy, and I think he would have flown me across the world. Praise God, I came to my senses! To think I might have ended up trapped in a land where women are slaves to their husbands! The third terminated our relationship after finding a girl who had no limitations. He was in jail for rape by the time I married Greg.

That last one was rough, because it ended in real heartbreak. The kind of heartbreak that makes you want to die. I cried every day for weeks and begged God several times a day to take away the pain. I remember my mom sitting on my bed saying, “You don’t know what could happen. God could bring you the perfect Christian guy. A year from now you could be married!”

It seemed impossible. I laughed through my tears though there was a glimmer of hope. God is mighty, and He does big things.

I barely knew Greg. I have a vivid memory of sitting in the same computer lab doing homework. I was studying at a table, while he was writing a program. Apparently it wasn’t going well, and he was cussing like a sailor. Hardcore, offensive profanity. I thought, “I could never marry a heathen like that.” No joke!

Not only that, but I liked clean cut. He had a ponytail. I noticed eyes, he wore glasses. His pants and shirts were too short. Seriously, his pants were several inches above his ankles. I was surprised when he walked into the room one day with new clothes and contacts! I thought, “Wow! He’s actually attractive when he doesn’t look like a geek!" We enjoyed chatting now and then. Once he impressed me with his kindness and patience when he took the time to teach me three different ways to do matrices on my calculator.

After my horrible heartbreak I prayed and made a strong commitment to God that I would never date again unless the man loved Jesus as much as I did. One day, I got an e-mail from Greg out of the blue. I had asked him to e-mail me during a casual conversation the previous year before he went off to grad school. “Send me an e-mail when you get there.” and he took me seriously. It’s funny, I don’t even remember that conversation!

What a nice e-mail it was! Well written and overflowing with his amazing sense of humor. I looked forward to receiving more letters from this new friend. It would be a fun and refreshing break from the monotony of school.

But I was cautious. I knew my weakness and was determined to keep my commitment to God. I knew I couldn’t trust myself if I spent time with a guy, so I did everything I could to guard against romance. The first time he came back to visit his parents for vacation and wanted to get together, I warned him, “This is JUST friendship. It’s NOT a date.” Poor guy! He had never even kissed a girl, and after hearing THAT, he was scared to try anything! He was a perfect gentleman.

We went to a restaurant, and I prayed before we ate. Afterwards, he looked me straight in the eye and said, “Farrah, that was really beautiful.” There was no hint of mockery. He was completely serious, and I was floored at this incredible, rare display of sincerity. I knew that Greg wasn’t a Christian, but he was real. In fact, that was one of the things that struck my family when they eventually met him: His sincerity.

I have little else to add beyond what Greg said. I shared my faith with him, and we fell in love over time through e-mail. I was worried about what would happen. I was extremely distraught when we had to end our friendship. It was heartbreak city all over, but this time I was confused. “Why God? WHY? I don’t understand how this happened again! I tried SO hard to do the right thing this time! I will just have to trust that You know what You’re doing.”

But it wasn’t a week later before Greg told me that he realized he was giving up not just me but God and asked me to teach him more about Jesus. I had renewed hope. The day he told me he got saved was one of the happiest days of my life!

Something different with my relationship with Greg is that I experienced the full joy of being in love after he became a Christian. It was the first time I walked around with a silly grin all the time and told everyone I met that I was so happy I couldn’t contain it. It felt right, because it WAS right. He was the one God created for me. And you know what? It probably was just about a year after that conversation with my mom that Greg and I were united in marriage. Our Lord is amazing!

My Testimony: Ending Is Beginning

We broke up. Someone stopped the car, before we plunged off the cliff.

I thought long and hard about the situation. Here was a young woman who chose her faith over me. Though I knew she was as head-over-heels for me as I was for her, this Jesus guy trumped all else. She dumped me, for a dead guy in an old book.

But what if there really was something to Jesus? Then I would not only lose her, but also a chance to find the answer to what I may have been missing all along. By the next morning, my mind was made up: I had to find out. I had to know if this Jesus, that she chose over me, was for real. I sent her an e-mail and told her that I wanted to know more about Jesus. I told her I could make no promises about us, until I made up my mind about Him. Later that day, she called me, and I spoke to her dad, a pastor. He was very nice, and he recommended I buy a King James Bible and study the Gospel of John.

I had tried reading the Bible before, for classes and Young Life, but it never made much sense to me, and it was very boring reading. Still, I needed to find out more about Jesus, and that seemed as good a place to start as any.

I went to the local bookstore, a dinky place in an old building, and scoured the Bible racks for a KJV. Didn't find one until I looked up. High, on the topmost shelf, someone had put a paperback KJV, all by its lonesome. It was meant for me. I bought it and began to read.

For some reason, the words made sense to me, now. The account of Jesus' travels and teachings became real to me. It was as if Jesus was speaking directly to me..., and I believed.

On April 8, 1998, while sitting at my desk, doing homework, I prayed the first earnest prayer of my young life. I asked Jesus to forgive my sins and to guide me in every decision I would ever make, including whether this girl that I still loved was the one for me.

She was.

And still is.

The following December, we were married, and Farrah and I will be celebrating our 11th anniversary this year.

So, this was actually the story of a love triangle. A Savior who loved His children beyond imagining used one to lead the other to Him. For that, I will always be thankful to Jesus, and to a woman who had the faith to love Him more than me.

So, did I adopt new beliefs for the love of a woman? Some may say that I have, but that's an awfully shallow way of looking at it. No one ever comes to Jesus, without Him first drawing them to Himself. He uses different means, depending on the person. For some, it's hardship. For others, it's the example of a faithful servant. For me, it was the love of a woman... for her Savior.

My Testimony: Being Led and Leading On

Now, you might remember from my last post that I had decided to never let any girl alter my beliefs. Keep that in mind, because it's pertinent to what happened next.

There was a girl (isn't that how it always happens???) in college, whom I had a crush on. She was in the same major as me, only a year younger, but I was always a grader for her professors, so I didn't want to mix business with pleasure. OK, I was shy and totally scared out of my shorts to even say anything to her, save for teaching her how to do matrices on a calculator and talking about Star Wars. True story! Can you say G-E-E-K???

When I went to graduate school (1800 miles away), we started corresponding via e-mail. I quicky discovered that she was a devout, ultra-conservative Christian, very different from any other religious person I had ever met. She seemed to live what she preached, not just on Sundays, but every day. We both greatly enjoyed our discussions, and as often happens in such cases, we fell in love. OK, not just in love, but head-over-heels, walking-on-Cloud-Nine, miss-your-floor-on-the-way-up-the-stairs (also a true story!) type of love. The kind that makes people around the two of you want to hurl. ;)

But there was a barrier. She loved Jesus, and I didn't. I wanted nothing to do with religion (little did I know that religion and Jesus have nothing to do with each other!). She shared the Gospel with me and told me that she could not maintain a relationship with (much less marry) a guy that did not believe the same as her (turns out she had already gone down that road, and it inevitably led to heartache). Unwilling to even consider "converting", but already head-over-heels for her (note that our relationship was strictly over e-mail, with only a couple phone calls in-between), I kept postponing the issue.

I'm ashamed of this now, but whenever she brought it up, I told her our love was like a car barrelling toward a cliff, without any brakes. I said that we won't know what will happen, but that the ride would be exciting. Inside, I was hoping that we could work it out, that we would stay together, without me having to pretend that I'm a religious person. After all, I wasn't ever going to let a girl change my beliefs.

One afternoon, it came to a head. She said that she had to make a stand for what she believed: in spite of her deep love for me, she could not marry a guy who did not love Jesus as much as she did. I answered that I never would. We broke up.

She cried herself to sleep that night, but she knew, though it hurt, that she made the right decision.

My Testimony: The Early Years

This blog's new incarnation is approaching the one-year mark, and I recently realized that I've never shared how I came to the Lord. Let's fix that right now.

I was born in Romania, in a non-religious home. I think my parents did a good job teaching me right from wrong, but I had very little knowledge of the Bible or its Magnificent Author. As a teenager in the U.S., I was pretty much an atheist.

My first real exposure to the Christian religion (but not really Jesus) started when a high school classmate invited me to a Young Life event. I had no idea what Young Life was; I thought it was just a party. We did volleyball and lots of fun competitive games, and at the very end, one of the leaders gave a short message. I liked it and went back the following week, but with each successive event, less and less time was spent on fun and more on the Bible. I started to realize that the games were a way to get young people to come and hear the good news.

Unfortunately, while they taught about man's sinful nature, I only remember a "believe only", watered-down version of Salvation. I "decided" to follow Jesus, but did not repent of my sins nor gave my life to Him. Aside from their organized events, I didn't read the Bible, much less study it. I prayed to God, but He didn't seem to respond back. I continued in my sinful ways, unaware that Jesus had so much more in store for me.

The one unforgettable experience I had, in my one-year foray into Young Life, was a summer camp in British Columbia. There, at the Malibu Club, is some of the most beautiful country that God has ever made! But aside from the fun and challenging activities (especially the zip line that I almost chickened out on), I did not grow at all spiritually. I can't blame the staff; I wasn't ready. I now think that God was preparing me, but He was not calling, yet.

After I returned home, they kept asking me to come to other events, throughout the week: church, Bible studies, picnics, etc... I went more out of a sense of obligation, than anything else. Oftentimes, I would make up excuses, when I really didn't feel like going. The last event I think I ever attended was a mini-camp, ironically not far at all from where we now live. The last evening, I took a walk with my counsellor, and we chatted for a while. I mentioned that while the Bible has great teachings, I didn't take everything in it literally. I said that since men wrote it, it must have many mistakes. He didn't take that very well. It wasn't so much WHAT he said, as HOW he said it. He said that I couldn't follow Jesus if I didn't believe the ENTIRE Bible as true. Of course, I see that now (thought there are many parts that are symbolic, not to be taken literally), but his reaction was the last straw for me. From that point on, I saw religious people as no different from anyone else, except that they were stuck following a bunch of rules and doing boring things, like going to church and reading outdated writings. I felt sorry for them. I think that was the last time I had anything to do with Young Life.

As I got into college, I not only finalized my decision that there was nothing to Christianity (or any religion, for that matter), but also that I would never let any girl change my mind.

By the way, the picture of the guy on the zip line isn't me, unless I fainted on the way down! No, if it was me, you'd see a guy desperately clutching the rope. I think I'm getting better about it now, nearly 20 years after the fact, since a new friend has introduced me to rock-climbing. But that's a story for another time.